I'm sorry I'm too broke to take you out to a bar and get you drunk there.

I recently turned 21, and so did my boyfriend. It has brought on a lot of conversation about how we should get out of the house and go to that bar down the corner. If you're over 21 I'm sure you're in the same boat, either with the person you're dating or your friends who you want to hang out with.

My very broke solution:
Pizza and PBR (or Mickeys if you really aren't trying to impress anyone)
At a bar I'll easily throw down $40 to get two people through the night, more than that if I want to have a really good time. On Mickeys or PBR I'll throw down about $6 for myself and be as jolly as santa.
Now pizza, sure you can order it, but if you're stuck at your house you may as well try to impress your friends somehow. After all, it's very important to remind your friends that you are as cool and fun as you know you are.
At Trader Joe's (on Market st.) you can get pizza dough for ninety-nine cents. This is exciting, I'm fully aware. You can also buy a can of tomato puree for sixty cents just about anywhere. These two ingredients are all you need to make breadsticks. Now before you yell at me for how lame breadsticks are, don't forget about that Mickeys and PBR you have, the fact that you have friends, and the fact that you are awesome. Think about all the shapes you can make and then eat. It actually sounds kinda fun right?
So I know the next time my friends wanna go to a bar I'm gonna pay about $8 instead and have some shitty beer and breadsticks.


Or if you're really stuck on that pizza idea you can pick up a block of cheese (or soy cheese for those of you that know what's up) and shred it yourself (it's cheaper this way). Another idea, if you don't have any seasonings to put on the tomato puree you may be better off just getting a tomato, and cutting it into pieces on the crust, and then just putting the cheese on top of that.

Oh, and while you're at Trader Joe's did you know you're allowed to sample anything there? The employees are allowed to open any box and let you try it all you have to do is ask. This is an excellent way to get free lunch. Just ask to try a few things, I mean you never know when you'll need spicy soy and flax tortilla chips right?

I'm sorry I'm too broke to go to your dumb christmas party.

Oh yes, it's that time of year. When we're all afraid to go to our friend's parties because all of a sudden we're expected to have both cooking skills and money (please note this is not an or, this is an and. You need both).

So next time you hear those dreaded words, "just cook something to bring over" think of this recipe for chocolate soda cake. For the record this will not taste like soda.

You will Need:

10 oz. of coke or pepsi (think a can of soda that you took 2 sips from)- 75 cents

1 chocolate cake mix (the store brand one will do)- about $2

Add the soda to the cake mix. Mix really well. Bake just a little longer then directed on the box.

Voila! Impress your friends with a cake you made for $2.75. You can also buy frosting, but usually I just throw some powdered sugar on the top if I have some.