Hey there sexy party people.

And of course, don't forget my list of karaoke nights.

MONDAY

Mighty Writers- Michaela Majoun hosts a one-hour broadcast of poetry, music and spoken word. FREE 7-8 pm at Kelly Writer's House on 3805 Locust Walk

Tigerbeats Indie Dance Party- Wow..I hate to start my blog off like this, 2 such lame things in a row is a little overwhelming. But yeah go to the Barbary 21+. No cover.

Unplugged Metal Monday- $5-$8 at the Tritone 1508 South St. 21+

Bingo at el Camino Real- Free BINGO every Monday night from 8-10pm at El Camino Real. Prizes include veggie wings, nachos and pitchers of margaritas or beer. From 8-10 1040 N. 2nd St.

Karaoke at the Khyber- My personal favorite at 5 South 2nd st. With $1 PBR until 11. At that rate you're sure to get even your shiest friends up to sing.

Open Mic Night- Fergie's pub open mic night 21+ no cover charge. 1214 Sansom St.

Free Tai Chi Class- Every Monday at 2 increase your flexibility and do those cool arm move thingies at the Philadelphia Free library on 18 S. 7th St.

Philly Rising Open Mic Night- World Cafe Live. 7:00 Most people go there and order food and watch the music. Broke people get free water and watch the music. WARNING: Anyone can sign up for this, so on occasion I've seen people playing and reppin dirty jerz bra! Located on 3025 Walnut St.

Free Salsa Lessons (21+)- Free salsa l

essons every monday at Vango Lounge and skybar. The drinks can definately get a little expensive there, but rest assured all their beer costs less than $6.

Free HIV testing- It's like Nike, just do it, 1315 Spruce St. 2-5 William Way Community Center

TUESDAY

Blues Riot with Loki- at the Note on 142 Market St. 8pm $5

City Center with Clean Equations and Closed Storms- playing at Danger Danger gallery 5013 Baltimore Ave. 8pm Paywhat you can $5-$10.

$2 Tuesdays- $2 rum and coke, $2 Miller Light, $2 mini burgers, $2 Chicket fingers. At the Rum Bar on 20th and Walnut.

Plausible Artists Potluck- Join other artists and creative minds to network discuss and munch on shard food. Free. Basekamp (723 Chestnut St.)

Chess for Adults- 6pm at 201 South 40th St. at the Free Library located there. Call 215-685-7671 for more information.

Drinking Liberally- Oh man, I bet this is so up it's own ass. This is there description "Assemble with like-minded liberal folk, get smashed, and chat." 6-9 at Triumph Brewing Company 117-121 Chestnut St.

Forest Basics- Free yoga class at Studio 34 4522 Baltimore Ave. 4-5:30

Lickety Split Acoustic Night- Often so bad you have to laugh. Which honestly, is what I want out of my open mic. 9:30 no cover 21+ 4th and South.

Tritone Open Mic- No cover 21+ 7:30 1508 South St.

Yoga in the Park- Free at Rittenhouse Square, if you don't know where that is use google and get out of your house sometimes. 6:30 pm

WEDNESDAY

Interviewing Skills- FREE at 19th and Vine at the Free library there. Use these techniques to try to become less broke!

THURSDAY

Noir: A novel- "With Noir, Coover—who was described in the New York Times as “a one-man Big Bang of exploding creative force”—creates a classic crime story in which nothing is what it seems to be." Come hear him talk about his book. At the Free library of Philadelphia on 19th and Vine. FREE

Prophets in Stereo- FREE concert at Triumph Brewing Company at 400 Union Square at 9:30

Ted Greenwald Readings- Ted Greenwald is a New York boy through and through. Listen to him read selections from his 30 year career in poetry. FREE from 6-7 at Kelly Writer's House on 3805 Locust Walk

April Fool's Fest- "Rare Bird Show hosts a night of stand-up, sketch, and improv comedy featuring Chip Chantry, Aaron Hertzog, and Dava Krause." At The Khyber $5 at 9:30

FRIDAY

WXPN's Free at noon- At the world cafe live free (duh) at noon (duh) go hear some live music fool.

Daly's Irish Pub Drag Show- Who doesn't love a drag show? Only terrible people don't. This is a free one for those of you who are over 21 at Daly's Irish Pub on 4201 Comly St.

SATURDAY

Tour of The Kimmel Center Art and Architecture- which if you've ever been in the kimmel center before you know is fascinating. 10:30 in the morning at the Kimmel center on Broad St. (For more information- http://www.kimmelcenter.org/planning/tours.php)

Traditional Irish Music Session (21+)- Join Fergie's Pub on 1214 Sansom St. at 4 for a traditional Irish music session.

Classic Metal night (21+)- from 5-7 get free pizza pizza and $2 beer of the week and well drinks. At the dive Saturday night on Passyunk Ave (by 7th and Carpenter)

Penny drinks and drafts (21+)- yup that's right drinks for a penny, the only catch is that there is a $6 or $7 cover charge. At Roosevelts and Room VII at 23rd and Walnut

SUNDAY

Lickety Split Standup Sundays- Host Damon D. welcomes all levels of talent, including professionals, TV writers and up-and-comers, for this open mic night. Just because you're welcome doesn't mean he won't make fun of you if you bomb, though. Lickety Split 401 South St. 10pm. Free

12th air porno bingo- 254 S. 12th st. Starts at 10pm.

Improv class- Any level is welcome, aka it's cool if you suck, and if you're good people will all just go "wow" is great for an ego of any level. Get feedback from professionals, and then network in the social hour following the class. Free at the Community Education Center 3500 Lancaster Ave.

Sexy Sunday School- As someone who went to Sunday this is a little disturbing for me, but girls can drink for free, and you know how I love that. It's a costume party...so...dress like you're way to young for the guys who are gonna look at you. Kildare's 4417 Main St.

Showtune Sundays- "Bring your fair lady, put on a technicolor dream coat and come hang out with some guys and dolls who share your love of show tunes. The DJ will play clips from Broadway shows and movie musicals, and singing along is highly encouraged" Tavern on Camac 243 S. Camac St.. @

Kinky Quizzo- Free 10:30 pm. Valanni 1229 Spruce St.

Karaoke Nights

So what have we all learned from this blog?
There's a shitload going on in Philly. So much in fact, that it's getting hard to fit it all on one post. So I figured I would just make one that tells about the karaoke nights going on everywhere, so I don't have to put it on the week by week post.

I know I have missed a bunch help me out here!

Monday
*The Khyber at 56 S. 2nd St, which we all know is my personal favorite. $1 beers until 11!
*Tritone at 1508 South St.
*Smokey Joe's 210 S. 40th St.
*Milcreek Tavern- 4200 Chester Ave
*The American Pub- 1500 Market St.

Tuesday
*12 Steps Down 831 Christian St. (This bar even allows smoking, which makes for even worse singers)
*National Mechanics- 22 S. 3rd St.
*New Deck Tavern- 3408 Sansom St.
*Tavern on Camac- 243 South Camac St.
*Liberty Bar- 2204 Market St.
*Triumph Brewing Company- 117 Chestnut St

Wednesday
*South Philly Bar and Grill- 1235 East Passyunk
*New Wave Cafe 784 S. 3rd St.
*Barristers- 1823 Sansom St.
*Ohara's Fish House- 3900 Chestnut St.
*McGillins- 1310 Drury Lane
*Cavanaugh's Rittenhouse- 1808 Sansom St.
*Finn McCools- 118 S. 12th St.

Thursday
*Samba- 714 Girard Ave.
*Sisters- (yes this is a lesbian bar) 1320 Chancellor St. (right in the gayborhood)
*Westy's- 15th and Callowhill
*Applebees- 215 S. 15th st.
*Isla Verde Cafe- 2725 N. American St.
*Ly Michaels- 101 N. 11th st.
*Reales Sports Bar- 7233 Frankford Ave.
*The Happy Rooster- 118 S. 16th St.
*Slainte Pub- 3000 Market St.
*Expresso Yourself- 6411 Frankford Ave (8:30-11)
*My Blue Heaven Karaoke- 2762 E. Pacific St.
*Paddy Whack's Karaoke- 150 South St.
*Sunday Night Karaoke- 637 N. 3rd St.

Friday
*Ray's Happy Birthday Bar- 1200 E. Passyunk Ave.
*Mc Gillins- 1310 Drury Lane
*Ly Michaels- 101 N. 11th St.

MONDAY

Twilight Movie showing (21+)- 8pm at the Trocadero $3 which goes towards a drink or snack, get there before 7 for a free bag of popcorn and beer. And oh man, if anyone I know goes to see this, I'm sorry but we can't be friends anymore.

Tigerbeats Indie Dance Party- Wow..I hate to start my blog off like this, 2 such lame things in a row is a little overwhelming. But yeah go to the Barbary 21+. No cover.

Unplugged Metal Monday- $5-$8 at the Tritone 1508 South St. 21+

Women, Gateway District, Joe Jack Talcum, That's Incredible!, No! Go! Tell!- $5 gets you into this show which involves ex members of dead milkmen, off with their heads, and bands from around the country. Should be pretty sweet at the Ox on 2nd and Oxford St.

Troilus and Cressida- For those of you who have no idea what those two words together mean, it's actually Shakespeare's play about the Trojan war. Go see a free reading of it at 6:30 at 143 South 3rd St. Though tickets are free, reservations are recommended, call 215-409-6700 to get them.

Bingo at el Camino Real- Free BINGO every Monday night from 8-10pm at El Camino Real. Prizes include veggie wings, nachos and pitchers of margaritas or beer. From 8-10 1040 N. 2nd St.

Karaoke at the Khyber- My personal favorite at 5 South 2nd st. With $1 PBR until 11. At that rate you're sure to get even your shiest friends up to sing.

Open Mic Night- Fergie's pub open mic night 21+ no cover charge. 1214 Sansom St.

Free Tai Chi Class- Every Monday at 2 increase your flexibility and do those cool arm move thingies at the Philadelphia Free library on 18 S. 7th St.

Philly Rising Open Mic Night- World Cafe Live. 7:00 Most people go there and order food and watch the music. Broke people get free water and watch the music. WARNING: Anyone can sign up for this, so on occasion I've seen people playing and reppin dirty jerz bra! Located on 3025 Walnut St.

Free Salsa Lessons (21+)- Free salsa l

essons every monday at Vango Lounge and skybar. The drinks can definately get a little expensive there, but rest assured all their beer costs less than $6.

Free HIV testing- It's like Nike, just do it, 1315 Spruce St. 2-5 William Way Community Center

Philadelphia Freedom Band Practice- "The Philadelphia Freedom Band is a concert band for amateur musicians of every sexual persuasion: gay, lesbian, bi, transgender and straight are all welcome. No auditions necessary." Know how to play an instrument kinda? Are you bored? This is your chance baby! 55 N. Broad St. at a church, from 7-9

TUESDAY

Fred Shater w/ Vice Roayl- 8pm $8 at the Khyber 56 S. 2nd St. 21+ with $1 beers until 11.

Sela with the New Age Crew and Curly Castro- 7pm North Star Bar $7 2639 Poplar St.

$2 Tuesdays- $2 rum and coke, $2 Miller Light, $2 mini burgers, $2 Chicket fingers. At the Rum Bar on 20th and Walnut.

Comedy Dreams- Stand up/Short plays/videos/Music and a dance party no cover at the Barbary. 21+

Battle of the Bands- The Blockley 8:30 No cover.

The Things they Carried author comes to speak- With your student id it costs $7 to go watch him talk about a book I'm sure you had to read in highschool and just sparknoted instead. 19th and Vine at the HUGE library there 7:30

Plausible Artists Potluck- Join other artists and creative minds to network discuss and munch on shard food. Free. Basekamp (723 Chestnut St.)

Chess for Adults- 6pm at 201 South 40th St. at the Free Library located there. Call 215-685-7671 for more information.

Drinking Liberally- Oh man, I bet this is so up it's own ass. This is there description "Assemble with like-minded liberal folk, get smashed, and chat." 6-9 at Triumph Brewing Company 117-121 Chestnut St.

Forest Basics- Free yoga class at Studio 34 4522 Baltimore Ave. 4-5:30

Lickety Split Acoustic Night- Often so bad you have to laugh. Which honestly, is what I want out of my open mic. 9:30 no cover 21+ 4th and South.

Tritone Open Mic- No cover 21+ 7:30 1508 South St.

Yoga in the Park- Free at Rittenhouse Square, if you don't know where that is use google and get out of your house sometimes. 6:30 pm

WEDNESDAY

The Apostle movie showing- A movie starring Robert Duvall 6:30 Free Broad St. Ministry (right on Broad St at the Avenue of the Arts)

Dirt! the Movie- 150 N. 6th St. Followed by a dirt exhibit, free. I mean hey, who doesn't love some dirt. "It's under our feet and under our fingernails, but what is it? And how did it get there? Inspired by William Bryant Logan's acclaimed book Dirt:

The Ecstatic Skin of the Earth, find out how industrial farming, mining and urban development have led us toward cataclysmic droughts, starvation, floods and climate change. "

Jumanji movie showing- Free, all ages, 7 pm 2100 Fairmount Ave- Mugshots coffee house

L'Enfer Movie Showing- French film showing at 1905 Locust St. Library at 2 pm

Our Night out- Meet and greet for the 2010 gay games 1528 Sansom St. Ladder 15 from 6-9.

Admiral Goldberg and the Wayefaring Seamen- Free bands, 9pm at Millcreek tavern 4200 Chester Ave.

Rockers!- 9:30 at Tritone $5-$8 1508 South St. 21+

Workplace We

d. Resume Critique- Can't get a job, maybe this can help go to the huge library at 19th and Vine at 6:00 and for free have someone help you make your resume look better.

Donald Welch Reading- The author of the Philly-set "In My Sister's House" discusses his new novel about two very different sisters. At Boarders on 1 S. Broad St. Free 6:30 pm

Kaballah- Madonna does it, so why don't you do it too? Figure out if you belong in the same spiritual path of Brittney Spears, Demi More and other winners "Everybody's got it, few people use it. In this talk, David Ghiyam, a teach at the Kabbalah Centre Consciousness, addresses how to transform personal and global challenges." A little pretentious, probably, but probably a little funny as well. Barnes and Nobles 1805 Walnut St. Free 6-7

Salsa and Sangria- "YOUCIE (Young Friends of University City) is putting on a free event called "Salsa and Sangria". They're providing free sangria and snacks, while instructors from the University City Arts League teach a "street salsa" dance lesson as a preview of their Spring dance programming" Free at the University City Arts League 4226 Spruce St. 6:30-8:30

Sattriya In Philadelphia- Madhusmita Bora will discuss and perform Sattriya, and dance from monasteries. Free from 6-8 at the Philadelphia Folklore Project 734 South 50th St.

THURSDAY

Hip Hop Hookah- Get a free hookah from 10pm to 1am. Ok...so here's the catch you have to get a philadelphia weekly, the paper that is always free, and is all over the city go to page 28 where you will see a coupon o get a free hookah from Byblos, cut it out and take it to 116S. 18th st.

Copy Jam!- A gallery with 50 different artists, free to get in, and you get a ticket that gets you a copy of one print that you liked a lot. Hey, free art to decorate your boring house, not to shabby. 6-9 at 116 N. 3rd St.

Metal Show- Do your friends think you're lame? Has your hair never been any longer than your ears? Do you not have any clue how to rock? Well make them think you're cool once and for all by inviting that cute (well...cute for you) girl/boy you've had your eye on to a metal show. Then they'll all know you're cool. And it only costs $5 a ticket, at JR's bar on 22nd and Passyunk. Bands playing Hatchet, Witchaven, Vulcan, Hessian.

Penny Hill and Peninsula: An acoustic night- show at the wooden shoe, on south at 7th at 7pm. Free? Or most likely very cheap, couldn't find the price. And if you haven't been to the wooden shoe you should go.

FRIDAY

Philip D'Agostino Quintet- "Bassist Philip D'Agostino has been a fixture in the Philadelphia music community for over 10 years, recording, touring, and performing with countless bands, collectives, and singer songwriters in the region...D'Agostino is currently performing with a quintet featuring Philly talents Ross Bellenoit (guitar), Jon Thompson (woodwinds), Nate Gonzalez (keyboards), and Ferd Berman (drums)." Free at the Kimmel Center right on Broad St. In Center C

ity at 5:30

This Dream Called Death- reading by Steven Janis 7pm-8:30 pm. Couldn't find a price, feel free to look for yourself at their website. Probably free or cheap. At the Wooden Shoe on South at 7th.

A normal Ridiculous- One their facebook they have "Paradigm Gallery is proud to present NOSEGO for their first show. Food and drinks will be served. Thanks to all sponsors this party is going to be amazing. Special Thanks to NOSEGO for putting up a fantastic opening for us. Please come out March 26. 6pm 2020 South St."

SATURDAY

Kimmel Center Youth Jazz Ensemble- 12:30 Free performance at the Kimmel Center, which if you haven't been in before you should really go in just to look around. Located right on Broad St. at the Avenue of the Arts

Tour of The Kimmel Center Art and Architecture- which if you've ever been in the kimmel center before you know is fascinating. 10:30 in the morning at the Kimmel center on Broad St. (For more information- http://www.kimmelcenter.org/planning/tours.php)

Traditional Irish Music Session (21+)- Join Fergie's Pub on 1214 Sansom St. at 4 for a traditional Irish music session.

SUNDAY

Pan Asian Dance- At 2 at the Central Library on 19th and Vine go watch "original choreography inspired and influenced by Chinese, Filipino, Japanese and Thai culture." For Free!

We have pins now!

Made by the wonderful Heatheriscrafty

THIS WEEK IN BROKE NEWS

Sorry this post is coming late this week, but I've been very busy and very sick. Either way, here is the end of the week at least, so hopefully you guys weren't too broke and bored on Monday or Tuesday.

Wednesday (St. Patrick's Day)
Free Irish Breakfast- From 7-9 at Kildare's at 4414 Main St.

Free Pancakes- No cover before 11 am at Fado 15th and Locust.

Showing of the Red Shoes- Ever seen a chorus line, that's the only reason I know the title of this, where everyone talks about how they cried when they saw it. There will be other short films following it. At 7pm $5-8.

Mrs. Doubtfire Showing- Free at Mugshots Coffeehouse and Cafe at 7 pm. Located at 2100 Fairmount Ave.

Movie showing of Betty- A French film about a woman caught having an affair who is no longer allowed to see her children and the alcoholic binge that follows.

Waltz With Bashir movie Showing- Broad St. Ministry right on Broad in the Avenue of the arts. Free at 6:30

Colonizers- 8pm $8 at the Khyber 56 S. 2nd St.

New Wave Cafe Karaoke- 3rd and Catherine 9:30.

Qspace- 8pm These weekly chat programs provide support, information and resources for those seeking to learn more about sexual orientation and gender identity. 3907 Spruce St.

Locust Rendezvous Quizzo- Feat. Johnny Goodtimes. Get your divebar on.

Long walk home, The Quelle Source, and Carl Stokking-9 pm $5 3801 Chestnut St. (for more information visit the blockey.com)

Roosevelt Pub Texas Hold 'Em- 8pm 2222 Walnut St. Be careful though this is free it could very easily make you even broker then you were to begin with.

Traditional St. Patrick's day Party at PYT- If you want green beer and loud music and some chicks wearing less then they should. This would be the party for you my friend. Happy hour from 5pm-8pm includes $2 Highlifes, $3 Green Kenzingers and $4 Jamesons. Head to the back room for music by DJ Dirty, Lady Prowl, Sammy Slice, Gun$ Garcia, and Brendan Bring 'Em. 1050 N. Hancock St.

Thursday
Ars Nova pres. The Respect Sextet performing the music of Sun Ra and Karlheinz Stockhausen. 8 pm at the Rotunda in West Philly. (Visit www.therotunda.org for more information)

Burrison Gallery opening reception- 4 pm at 3611 Walnut St. Photos that focus on Australian culture.

Figure drawing- There is no instructor, just a few artists and a model. This is completely free, so if this is your thing what are you waiting for? 7-10 pm 831 N. 2nd St. Apt. 3

Alicia Sams- whose most recent film was "By the People: The Election of Barack Obama" and exec produced "Amreeka" discusses film. Free at Kelly Writer's House on 3805 Locust Walk.

The Bard's Quizzo- On 20th and Walnut at The Bard's Irish Bar

Art Therapy for the LGBTQ community- Come get your thoughts out with a paintbrush for free at Mazzoni center on 8th and Locust.

Daly's Irish Pub Drag Show- Who doesn't love a drag show? Only terrible people don't. This is a free one for those of you who are over 21 at Daly's Irish Pub on 4201 Comly St.

Happy Rooster Karaoke- 118 S. 16th St. 10pm- 1:30

Love's Fire: Seven New Plays Inspired By Shakespearean Sonnets: 7 sonnets are paired with modern plays they've inspired. Madeline Wing Adler Theatre free 817 S. High St. 7:30 pm

Tom Keels reading excerpts from "Wicked Philadephia"- He will also be signing books. From 7:30-9 at Head House Books 619 S. 2nd St.

Live Irish Music Session- 8:30 at the Irish Times Free 629 S. 2nd st. (May be 21 up, it was hard to tell.)

William Peter Blatey Speaking- 7:30 at the Free Library on 19th and Vine "An Academy Award-winning screenwriter and producer, William Peter Blatty is the author of the iconic horror novel The Exorcist.... Set in 1970’s Albania, Dimiter—Blatty’s first full-length novel since Legion—is a chilling psychological drama that opens on a torture table."

Astrology Workshop- 7:00 at the Free Library on 19th and Vine "Explore the world of astrology, and how it can impact your daily life! Workshop leaders, Adam Travia and Kay Wisniewski cover the basics: terminology, symbols, natal charts, the twelve signs of the Zodiac, the planets, the houses, elements & aspects"

Friday
WXPN's Free at noon- At the world cafe live free (duh) at noon (duh) go hear some live music fool.

Daly's Irish Pub Drag Show- Who doesn't love a drag show? Only terrible people don't. This is a free one for those of you who are over 21 at Daly's Irish Pub on 4201 Comly St.

Noise Art Party- Features 21 artists with their interpretations on clay interacting with the real world. Uses found objects and 3D installations on surfaces to represent the modern world. Noyes Museum of Art, 733 Lily Lake Rd.

Pizza Pub Karaoke- 1940 W. Passyunk Ave. 8pm to 2am.

American Indian spirituality- Explore it for free at the Church 2121 Chestnut St. (But if you're cool at all you didn't need me to tell you where is was) Ladies only.

Saturday
Philly Youth Poetry Night + Open Mic- At the Rotunda in West Philly 6 pm. (Visit www.therotunda.org for more details)

Printeresting Swap-a blog devoted to printmaking, is asking participants to bring comix, t-shirts, zines, stickers and other print-based items to be swapped with others. So bring that lame zine you made in high school and see if someone could either do what you were trying to do better, or if somehow someone did it even worse. Printcenter 1614 Latimer St.

Daly's Irish Pub Drag Show- Who doesn't love a drag show? Only terrible people don't. This is a free one for those of you who are over 21 at Daly's Irish Pub on 4201 Comly St.

Tour of The Kimmel Center Art and Architecture- which if you've ever been in the kimmel center before you know is fascinating. 10:30 in the morning at the Kimmel center on Broad St. (For more information- http://www.kimmelcenter.org/planning/tours.php)

Traditional Irish Music Session (21+)- Join Fergie's Pub on 1214 Sansom St. at 4 for a traditional Irish music session.

Classic Metal night (21+)- from 5-7 get free pizza pizza and $2 beer of the week and well drinks. At the dive Saturday night on Passyunk Ave (by 7th and Carpenter)

Penny drinks and drafts (21+)- yup that's right drinks for a penny, the only catch is that there is a $6 or $7 cover charge. At Roosevelts and Room VII at 23rd and Walnut

3rd Anual Playshot Festival- Shubin Theatre- $10 at 2pm and again at 7 pm. "We develop these plays over a 5-week period utilizing feedback from artists in rehearsals and performances before live audiences. The playwrights will be writing and re-writing the scripts during the entire process, so the plays will re-shape themselves over the course of the festival. Come join in and be a part of the artistic process!"

As you Like it- Re-imagined in the '60s, a psychedelic take on Shakespeare show about 4 couples. Madeleine Wing Adler Theatre, 817 S. High St.

Lickety Split Standup- "Host Damon D. welcomes all levels of talent, including professionals, TV writers and up-and-comers, for this open mic night. Just because you're welcome doesn't mean he won't make fun of you if you bomb, though." Lickety Split 401 South St. 10pm. Free

Love's Fire: Seven New Plays Inspired By Shakespearean Sonnets: 7 sonnets are paired with modern plays they've inspired. Madeline Wing Adler Theatre free 817 S. High St. 8 pm. Free

Sunday
Andrew’s Video Vault screens Napoleon- w/ a live score performed by MFM. Free at 7. For more information visit (www.therotunda.org)

3rd Anual Playshot Festival- Shubin Theatre- $10 at 2pm and again at 7 pm. "We develop these plays over a 5-week period utilizing feedback from artists in rehearsals and performances before live audiences. The playwrights will be writing and re-writing the scripts during the entire process, so the plays will re-shape themselves over the course of the festival. Come join in and be a part of the artistic process!"

Lickety Split Standup Sundays- Host Damon D. welcomes all levels of talent, including professionals, TV writers and up-and-comers, for this open mic night. Just because you're welcome doesn't mean he won't make fun of you if you bomb, though. Lickety Split 401 South St. 10pm. Free

12th air porno bingo- 254 S. 12th st. Starts at 10pm.

Improv class- Any level is welcome, aka it's cool if you suck, and if you're good people will all just go "wow" is great for an ego of any level. Get feedback from professionals, and then network in the social hour following the class. Free at the Community Education Center 3500 Lancaster Ave.

Sexy Sunday School- As someone who went to Sunday this is a little disturbing for me, but girls can drink for free, and you know how I love that. It's a costume party...so...dress like you're way to young for the guys who are gonna look at you. Kildare's 4417 Main St.

Showtune Sundays- "Bring your fair lady, put on a technicolor dream coat and come hang out with some guys and dolls who share your love of show tunes. The DJ will play clips from Broadway shows and movie musicals, and singing along is highly encouraged" Tavern on Camac 243 S. Camac St.. @

Kinky Quizzo- Free 10:30 pm. Valanni 1229 Spruce St.

OPEN (ALMOST) ALL WEEK
The Blue Door- Playing at the Arden, supposed to be an INCREDIBLE show. For $5 you can get in to see it if you have a student id, which is way cheaper and way more entertaining then the movies, so what are you waiting for? (Ardentheatre.org for more information)

Trashed- Features work of Shirley Thomas who makes small sculptures from recycled materials. 3rd St. Gallery 58 N. 2nd St.

Take a walking tour through the only Edgar Allan Poe house that's still standing today. 9am to 5 pm Free 532 N. 7th St.

Lace in Translation Art exhibit- The Design center at Philadelphia University 4200 Henry Avenue.

Henry Horenstein art gallery- Features sexy photographs focusing on the subculture of burlesque, from its modest beginnings to its 21st century resurgence. @ Gallery 339, 339 S. 21st St.

The Week of March 8th

As always I'll be adding to the list as the week goes on.
And leave a comment if there's something not on here that you'd like to be :)

TUESDAY
Chylde, Gondola, Jail (show at the Khyber 21+)- Check them out on myspace if you're curious $8 to get in, and the Khyber has that whole $1 PBR from 7-11 that I love so much give it a shot. 8 pm. The Curtis Contemporary Music Ensemble- Free at 8pm a celebration of Samuel Barber, included are one of his unfinished violin sonata (in a world premier) as well as vocal and chamber works. Sounds classy no? At the Curtis institute of Music on 1726 Locust St.

La Rue Des Faux: Street of Mistakes (Spotlight Series)- Join us for a special 10th Anniversary reading of our inaugural production, La Rue Des Faux, an adaptation of James Baldwin’s Giovanni’s Room. Raelle Myrick-Hodges, Azuka founder and the current Artistic Director of Brava Theater in San Francisco, returns to direct the reading 10 years after our first official opening night. Free location TBA click here for more details.

Plausible Artists Potluck- Join other artists and creative minds to network discuss and munch on shard food. Free. Basekamp (723 Chestnut St.)

Chess for Adults- 6pm at 201 South 40th St. at the Free Library located there. Call 215-685-7671 for more information.

WEDNESDAY
Ceasfire, The Holy Mess, Light Hearted, The Mad Splatter (Punk Show)- donations (aka basically free) at Breakfast and Desert at 44th and Locust 6 pm all ages, BYOB. THURSDAY Winters in Osaka + RICH HOAK, Skingraft, Koufar + P.T.M., Endless Humiliation (Metal show at Kung Fu Necktie)- Check them out on myspace if you're curious, impress all your friends by going to a real metal show...woah dude, totally headbanging the night away. (1248 N. Front St.) $5.

THURSDAY

Learn Chinese for Free- Every Thursday go to the Philadelphia Free Library at 18 S. 7th St. to learn Chinese for the English speaker.

Kingdom (21+)- Dance your ass off at the barbary...if you're into that sort of thing, no cover 951 Frankford and Delaware Ave.)

FRIDAY
Penny drinks (21+)- From 5-7 drinks and drafts for a penny, only catch is the $6 or $7 cover charge. At Roosevelts and Room VII at 23rd and Walnut.

Positively Sick on South St- 9pm $6. The Prisoners, Raunchy Sex, the Improbables at Tritone (1508 South St). In case you've been living under a rock and can't figure this sort of this out, this is a punk show.

WXPN's Free at noon- At the world cafe live free (duh) at noon (duh) go hear some live music fool.

SATURDAY
Tour of The Kimmel Center Art and Architecture- which if you've ever been in the kimmel center before you know is fascinating. 10:30 in the morning at the Kimmel center on Broad St. (For more information- http://www.kimmelcenter.org/planning/tours.php)

Traditional Irish Music Session (21+)- Join Fergie's Pub on 1214 Sansom St. at 4 for a traditional Irish music session.

Classic Metal night (21+)- from 5-7 get free pizza pizza and $2 beer of the week and well drinks. At the dive Saturday night on Passyunk Ave (by 7th and Carpenter)

Penny drinks and drafts (21+)- yup that's right drinks for a penny, the only catch is that there is a $6 or $7 cover charge. At Roosevelts and Room VII at 23rd and Walnut

Danaher and Cloud- Free presentation at the Kimmel center at 1:30. Traveling storytellers who also sing. (For more information go to www.danaherandcloud.com)

SUNDAY
Karaoke Night at the Barbary (21+)- Dollar drinks until 11. (Same idea as the Khyber, just a little lamer) 951 Frankford and Delaware Ave.

Free Bellydancing lesson (21+) from 9:30-10:30 come into Byblos (116 S. 18th St.) for greek/meditteranean night for a free bellydancing lesson.

OPEN (ALMOST) ALL WEEK
Romeo and Juliet- Playing at the Arden. For $5 you can get in to see it if you have a student id, which is way cheaper and way more entertaining then the movies, so what are you waiting for? (Ardentheatre.org for more information)

The Blue Door- Playing at the Arden, supposed to be an INCREDIBLE show. For $5 you can get in to see it if you have a student id, which is way cheaper and way more entertaining then the movies, so what are you waiting for? (Ardentheatre.org for more information)

No exit- A play by Satre. Where the whole hell is other people business comes from. $10 Curio Theatre Co. 815 S. 48th St.

Traits in Emotion- An art gallery exhibit running through March 15th at the Asian Arts Initiative at 1219 Vine St. Featuring painting and words by 11 different Philly artists exploring mental illness and how it effects art.

PROJECT H.O.M.E.S's 20th anniversary celebration- 74 pieces of art by 21 formerly homeless people who were helped out by project H.O.M.E. At the community art gallery on 1234 Market St. (Runs through April 14th)

One Book, One Philadelphia Graphic Art Contest Gallery- Open until March 12th, free, at Moore College of Art and Design, 20th and Vine. This gallery will feature the many entries for a juried graphic memoir competition designed around The Complete Persepolis. Competition entries are by students at Philadelphia’s four major art schools; for more information, please visit onebookgraphicarts.blogspot.com.

I'm sorry I'm too broke to buy you a bottle of wine

In 10 days my boyfriend and I will be celebrating our 2 and a half year anniversary, now he may have money, but I sure don't. So I've been thinking about making him some wine for a present.

Things you will need:
Yeast (one package)- you really should use champagne or wine yeast, you can use bread yeast, it just won't taste very good. Both cost about $0.50
2 cans of grape juice concentrate
2 cups of sugar
some water (About 2/3 of a gallon)
1 gallon jug (plastic works) Think the big jugs you buy water or fake juice in.
Pot to boil water in
A funnel, to pour things into the jug with
A condom or balloon

Here are the directions:
1-make sure everything you are using is VERY VERY clean, otherwise you will get bacteria in your wine.
2-Let water come to a boil for half an hour. And make sure your concentrate is room temperature
3- Pour the concentrate into the jug
4- While the water is still boiling add your sugar and stir until dissolved
5-Activate the yeast (your packet should have instructions on it)
6-Let the sugar water cool and then pour it into the jug until it is about 2/3 of the way full (this should use all your sugar water)
7-Add the yeast, again make sure everything is cool first!
8- Place baloon or condom on top of the jug secure it with a rubber band or hair tie.
9- Leave it alone for about 10-14 days and the baloon should inflate, and the mixture should go from cloudy to clear. (If neither of these things happen, your equipment probably wasn't clean enough, boil it then try again from step 1)
10- If these things do happen move it from your jug into another container or into some old wine bottles you have, leaving all the shit at the bottom in the old jug, and enjoy.

Let me know if you make it and how it goes!
(Make and drink at your own risk, this is some hobo wine lol)

I'm sorry I'm to broke to buy you a real present (or even the materials to make you real present)

...So instead, I'm going to just give you my garbage with a tag on it.

Some ideas and links to REALLY cheap gifts.

For the asshole in your life: Why not just find an old rag lying around your house and turn it into a penis for them. Hey...it's free and bound to get a few laughs.

For the girl you just met at the bar who is worth a dollar, but definitely not a whole beer: Why not fold a dollar into a heart and maybe if you're brave write your phone number on it, and you will be a corny pick-up line legend.

For the white trash girl in your life: And don't tell me you don't know one, everybody does. The next time you open up a beer save the bottle cap. Drill a hole into the top of the cap, or just put a nail through it, then put it on some earring backs. You can usually find them very cheap here. This is also a great present for whenever you have to make a bunch of ladies in your life presents at once.

Or maybe you're the type that prefers to drink their beer from a can: Then you can make those ladies bracelets instead of earrings. (Warning- you will have to drink a lot more beer to make these, I take no responsibilities)

For that slightly anal, always clean friend: Why not make them a bracelet out of a toothbrush. (Warning, be prepared to spend about a dollar on this gift)

For pretty much anyone who enjoys laughing: Did you know that #6 plastic (like a to-go container) can work as a shrinky dink? Remember, those things you used to draw on then put in the oven and they'd shrink and get hard, if you don't remember I'm sorry to hear your childhood sucked. So draw anything from a doodle to a sheriff's badge (I once made these for two of my friends, and they loved them) to dictionary definitions of words that describe your friends or even some of these fools if you friends fit into any of these categories, you can either put it in a frame on a pin or on some earring backs, or just give them plain. Or if you're willing to spend a dollar on them put it in a box made from a dollar. Oh by the way, you draw on the plastic then put it in the oven at like 250 until they shrink and are lying flat, this shouldn't take long.

If your good with tools and your friends are like little kids: Why not make them a launcher for a toy car?

For the foodies and wine-os in your life: Why not make some dandelion wine? Just plan a trip to the italian market, and make sure at some point you are going to be somewhere not in center city to gather some dandelions. This is a little more expensive, but is really cool.

For the artist in your life: Why not make them some paper to draw on out of the lint in your dryer? There are a few needed materials, but I bet you have most of them, even the window screen you could just go cut out of an old abandoned building...wait...no you can't, that's illegal.

For the artist in your life: Because you couldn't give them both the same present, they probably go out and drink coffee together, what if they think you aren't creative enough for them? Make the other one clay out of some lint. (The instructions are towards the bottom of the page). This way next time they have coffee together they'll be talking about how creative you are, not how you gave them both the same present.

For you pretentious friends: Go somewhere where they have cheap records, like that record store right next to Grindstone and Golden Empress Garden on 5th by South, or Relapse on South St. and find some cheap records to make a bowl out of.

For your hungry friend: Awhile ago I posted a recipe to make a cake for about $2 or $3. Why not just give that to a hungry friend? Everyone loves food, unless they suck.

Damn...thanks guys :)

So in the past week this blog has gotten over 300 views, and I just started a facebook group for it, and invited 20 people now there are almost 200 on it.

Nothing big time, I know, but I only made this blog like 2 months ago. It's been exciting for me to watch this grow from just me and my boyfriend checking it to now having people who regularly look.

Thanks for helping :)

If you want to join the facebook group it's here